Perfect

When I was in elementary school, I was one of the smart kids. I won't say that I wasn't, or pretend anything else otherwise, because I was, and it was a big part of my social life back then. I went to one of the two elementary schools in my town, and the kids there were either pretty bad students or my friends, who were also good students, the latter including about five or six kids in my whole grade. I was so shy back then that it was ridiculous, and it took me forever to even get up the courage to raise my hand in class a lot, or talk to the other kids. Once I did, though, I became locked in the role as the "smart one". And once I got to fifth grade, when the closed my old school and stuck us in a new school with kids I didn't know, it became who I was, whether I liked it or not. I was afraid to get something wrong, because then I wouldn't fit my role, and I would be out of character. It was like I was a character in a play, and the script had to be played out correctly. No improvising was allowed.

Not to brag or anything, but I am generally good at what I do. I get good grades, and I do well in music and dance. My worst subject is math, and that isn't even that bad. But I'm not perfect, or anywhere near it. I try to excel, but I can't get to every goal, and reach what other people have done, especially those I know.

I dance on pointe twice a week, but I've never danced until my feet bleed.

I've practiced for hours, and split my finger open, but I've never been on the point of collapse.

I've written for days and days straight during the summer, but have never been published in something other than an anthology or magazine. And I feel like my time is running out.

Does this mean I can't be good at these things, because I'm not as good as the best? I don't think so. Actually, I know it doesn't mean that. There is always someone better than me, and can't compete with the impossible. It's hard to remind myself that sometimes, though,

In my opinion, perfection is a false theory. It's like that advertisement that we always see, that tells us about something amazing, but the product never really lives up to the expectations. It's Utopia, the wonderful world at the end of the universe that everyone heard about but turned out to be the end of the world anyway. The skies weren't full of diamonds, and the truth isn't in the context of perfection, either. Perfection is the invisible line that we are always striving for, but we never get there. Because it doesn't exist.

In one of my favorite childhood books, Ramona's World, Ramona's classmate Susan is at her birthday party and not eating cake when she suddenly begins to cry. When everyone asks what is wrong, she sobs that her mother wants her to be perfect, and she can't. Whenever I read this, I think of all of those little girls who want to be like the princesses, perfect and wonderful. Yet it's impossible for them, and they are just disappointed. I can't believe I'm saying this, since I swore I would never quote her, but, as Miley Cyrus (or is it Hannah Montana?) says, "Nobody's perfect!" Well, a lot of other people have said that, too, but she's the one I think of when I hear it, which probably isn't a good thing.

All right, Miley. Nobody's perfect. You're right.